Sit down and listen, you whirling skud buckets! This is officer Drill Hammer and I have more than several words to say to you on Office Safety. For the dunder-mufflers chucking staplers at the tabby cat that screeches to the tune of camp town ladies during lunch break: put a hold on that fat phone call three times too many, because nailing that nasty free-wheelin she-beast with heavy utensils won’t make it take your rock n’ roll requests.Trust me. I’ve been thwacking that paddywhack tabby cat with paperweights since I was six months on four heads tall and I can tell you it just makes that verbal varmit hellcat vomit three times the trash buckets worth.
~Austin R Ryan